The Critic and The Muse
Both Critic and Muse are within me yet there was a battle! The Muse wants to be creative and exploring. The Critic tries to hold me back, thinking it is protecting me by reminding me
that I am not smart enough, pretty enough, etc.. Then I took a workshop with iMusea.org. that included journaling and drawing. I made 37 drawings working with felt pens on paper 25x30" This drawing is part of the battle. The phoenix is helping me erase negative thinking and rising above the past to see new opportunities for the adversaries to work together.
This painting developed from the drawing. It is the beginning. There is still emotional work to be done. The old negative section of my heart is blurred/confused. I look worried. The phoenix hovers above protecting my process. The sun and moon are eternally shinning.
Things have changed a little. The position of my hand and head have moved toward new possibilities. The hand now embraces the blank half of my symbolic exterior heart. My face seems to be waiting for what happens next. There are minor changes to the grass.
The completion! My image appears competent and is exploring my power and wisdom. This is my reality. The negative thinking went back into my childhood. Writing my book Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse, An Art Therapist's Journey dealt with much of the negative. These paintings are another step in healing visually through creating art. Healing is a multi layered process.
The phoenix is more vibrant. Tail feathers explode from my heart! My heart feels more open, accepting and loving of myself and others. This was an empowering journey.